A teacher of mine once asked me: “Whats the difference between a ritual and a rote task?”

After I blubbered for a few seconds he followed on: “Rituals have meaning”.

Do you have rituals in your life? Repetitive actions and behaviors that may be common but hold significance and trigger feelings or reactions?

A young family that came to a few of my classes to learn more about incorporating some Shabbat rituals just shared the following story with me:

A few weeks back, the husband and wife had an argument. For the next couple of days life just went on and while they didn’t revisit the argument the energy lingered for the days that followed.

The next Friday night Husband made kiddush (as was their new ritual) and held the intention that we had learned together as he recited the words.

Husband described to me that as he said the words a shift took place. In his body, he felt a line had been drawn, the week was over and he had somehow entered a new state. The baggage of the week was no longer in the room.

After a relaxed meal, they calmly put the kids went to bed and spontaneously decided to play a board game together. they moved to the couch for some tea and were able to unpack what had happened during the week in the most objective, loving and stress-free way.

This is what ritual can achieve. Holding a cup of wine, reciting ancient words with intention week in week out is more than a rote activity and should do so much more than just tick some religious box. That single ritual can have so many different effects in different settings.

Ritual is so important which is why over the next few months we will be launching various programs that will share the inner meaning and method of some beautiful Jewish rituals.